我年轻时所不了解的事情.
我年轻时所不了解的事情：
- 那些你曾经为之激动、兴奋，消耗了你无数时间和精力的事情，大多数是无足轻重的。
- 仇恨和痛苦的最主要来源常常是早已流逝的伤痛。
- 那些等着万事俱备才去做的事情往往永远也没机会做。
- 追逐时尚和流行，无论在生活上还是工作中，都无异于精神和智力上的自毁。
- 如果大家都抱怨你说你太特例独行与别人格格不入时，你一定在正确的轨道上。
- 如果工作是你全部的生活，你的生活就是一项艰苦的工作。
- 破坏任何关系最快捷的方式就是听信谣言。
- 企图取悦别人往往是徒劳无功的。
- 任何一个成功的人都有失败的时候。不要企图永远占据成功者的位置。
- 你不可能取悦、安慰或者改变一个混蛋。
- 每件事都要花费计划中两倍的时间而只得到期望中一半的成果。没必要为此沮丧，认清现实，继续前进。
- 狗改不了吃屎。骗子永远会找机会撒谎。忠实的人在众口铄金之下也能保持忠实。
- 无论你怎么尝试改变，你总是你自己。
- 世界上最响的声音就是人们的抱怨声。别再让它更响了。
以上為Lifebang翻譯版。 英文原文轉載自Lifehack。
I don’t buy the romantic notion that my life has been somehow richer or more interesting because of all the times I screwed up; nor that the mistakes were “put” there to help me learn. I made them myself—through ignorance, fear, and a dumb wish to have everyone like me—and life and work would have been less stressful and more enjoyable (and certainly more successful) without them. So here are some of the things I wish I had learned long ago. I hope they may help a few of you avoid the mistakes that I made back then.
- Most of it doesn’t matter. So much of what I got excited about, anxious about, or wasted my time and energy on, turned out not to matter. There are only a few things that truly count for a happy life. I wish I had known to concentrate on those and ignore the rest.
- The greatest source of misery and hatred in this world is clinging to past hurts. Look at all the terrorists and militant groups that hark back to some event long gone, or base their justification for killing on claims of some supposed historical right to a bit of land, or redress for a wrong done hundreds of years ago.
- Waiting to do something until you can be sure of doing it exactly right means waiting for ever. One of the greatest advantages anyone can have is the willingness to make a fool of themselves publicly and often. There’s no better way to learn and develop. Heck, it’s fun too.
- Following the latest fashion, in work or in life, is spiritual and intellectual suicide. You can be a cheap imitation of the ideal of the moment; or you can be a unique individual. The choice is yours. Religion isn’t the opiate of the masses, fashion is.
- If people complain that you’re too fond of going your own way and aren’t fitting in, you must be on the right track. Who wants to live life as a herd animal? The guys in power don’t want you to fit in for your own sake; they want you to stop causing them problems and follow their orders. You can’t have the freedom to be yourself and meekly fit in at the same time.
- If you make your work your life, you’re making your life into hard work. Like most people, I confused myself by looking at people like artists and musicians whose life’s “work” fills their time. That isn’t work. It’s who they are. Unless you have some overwhelming passion that also happens to allow you to earn a living doing it, always remember that work should be a means to an end: living an enjoyable life. Spend as little time on the means as possible consistent with achieving the end. Only idiots live to work.
- The quickest and simplest way to wreck any relationship is to listen to gossip. The worst way to spend your time is spreading more. People who spread gossip are the plague-carriers of our day. Cockroaches are clean, kindly creatures in comparison.
- Trying to please other people is largely a futile activity. Everyone will be mad at you sometime. Most of the people you deal with will dislike, disparage, belittle, or ignore what you say or do most of the time. Besides, you can never really know what others do want, so a good deal of whatever you do in that regard will go to waste. Be comforted. Those who love you will probably love you regardless, and they are the ones whose opinions are worth caring about. The rest aren’t worth five minutes of thought between them.
- Every winner is destined to be a loser in due course. It’s great to be up on the winner’s podium. Just don’t imagine you can stay there for ever. Worst of all is being determined to do so, by any means available.
- You can rarely, if ever, please, placate, change, or mollify an asshole. The best thing you can do is stay away from every one you encounter. Being an asshole is a contagious disease. The more time you spend around one, the more likely you are to catch it and become one too.
- Everything takes twice as long as you plan for and produces results about half as good as you hoped. There’s no reason to be downhearted about this. Just allow for it and move on.
- People are oddly consistent. Liars usually tell lies. Cheaters cheat whenever it suits them. A person who confides in you has usually confided in several others first—but not got the response they wanted. A loyal friend will stay loyal under enormous amounts of thoughtless abuse.
- However hard you try, you can’t avoid being yourself. Who else could you be? You can act and pretend, but the person acting and pretending is still you. And if you won’t accept yourself—and do the best you can with what you have—who then has any obligation to accept you?
- When it comes to blatant lies, there are none more egregious than budget figures. Time spent agonizing over them is time wasted. Even if (miracle of miracles!) yours are honest and accurate, no one else will have been so foolish.
- The loudest noise in the world is the sound of people whining. Don’t add to it.
____________________________________
原諒我最近都在生病跟懶惰，
僅有的精神也拿去寫情書。
翻出舊日存檔，姑且湊數一篇。
LIMITATIONS.
To start with limitations, 貌似不是一個好的選擇。
如果一個人看不清他自己，也不曾擁有自由選擇的權利，
那么即使他一直被圍困在limitations里面，亦不會自知。
或許我更想說的是boundary，一如我這兩天MSN的簽名：
因为不想别人进来，所以即使自己出不去也甘愿。
說的是我脖子上的鑰匙型項鏈墜子，so called “a key to my heart”.
我跟Chris說起“感情觀”：
我的城堡很坚固的 所以放一个人进来的时候
我要先知道我应该启动几级警报系统
但是至于他是要进到卧室还是只是来借用厕所 就不是我能控制的了
也許正因為如此，我才需要a key to my heart吧.
又或者我需要的其實是一顆隕石——意料之外，情理之中。
這個政治坐標系測試我今天居然看到3次耶！
結果顯示：
政治立场坐标（左翼<->右翼）0.8，
经济立场坐标（左翼<->右翼）0.35，
文化立场坐标（保守<->自由）-0.3 。
Windy姐姐很詫異我在文化立場上的保守態度，
可是我一直對傳統文化保有好感，
雖然我堅信如今我們看到的一切歷史都經過篡改。
然后今天過生日的獅子男令狐同學聊天途中發來這個連接，有點小感慨。
也许我们都知道自己是什么样的人 也知道对方是什么样的人
只可惜我们都以为这样成为伙伴没什么不好 甚至是没有比这更好的了
可是最终我们只是我们自己
這或許从另一个层面上证明互补型合作关系的不可为
又或者他们之间需要一个魅力型的领导者
也許他们可能都会终其一生找寻同类型但更易交流甚至是控制的伙伴
并且不停的心里进行着与从前那个人的比较
但是他们不仅不会承认而且也不会再會和最初的那個回到一起
簡直是戀愛關系的縮影。
平井堅說：
當你討厭你自己時 我不會鬆開你的手 但願我能承受你的傷痛
而我更貪心的希望：
可惜 我希望当我讨厌我自己的时候 有人能有抱着我
這也許再次證明了，我等待的可能只是一顆隕石。
到現在你應該已經要問，為什么你今天就不停的貼連接貼對白啊。
事實上編故事的時候我不擅長寫對白的原因就是我只在FOCUS我自己的部分，
而另一半都只是過場而已。
所以，你說的對，這整一篇ENTRY都只有在整理今天的聊天紀錄而已。
因為聊天紀錄就是那種即使你有設置保存卻不會再去看的東西。
那我不如就像剛買的BLENDER一樣榨出新鮮果汁，痛快喝掉，
不管還會機器還會再榨出多少。
物質生活。
MARIE CLAIRE八月刊上有一個PAGE都在DISCUSS為什么一條牛仔褲要賣到550美金。
沒有明說，但看似是一條DIESEL。細數點滴細節，只為證明值回標價。
我沒學過廣告不知道這樣算不算是軟廣告，不過廣告真的就是那些——
“billboards on the side of the road that screams with reassurance
that whatever you're doing..it's okay.”（Mad Man Season 1 Episode 1)
所以我覺得標簽的最高境界不是讓BRAND變得顯而易見 ，
而是成為一種只有同道中人才能夠破譯的密碼，從而換來心照不宣的默契和認同。
說起來物質生活這個話題還是從MATERIAL GIRL里扯出頭緒來。
最近為什么好像全美國都等著看PARIS HILTON跟LINDSAY LOHAN進監獄一樣。
還是那本MARIE CLAIRE講到這期封面人物ANNE HATHAWAY的時候用了一個詞，ANTI-LOHAN。
不錯，ANNIE同學乖巧伶俐又甜美，學業優異又上進自制；
可是我百思不得其解，曾幾何時LOHAN同學也是Straght A俱樂部的成員吧。
由“優等生”變為“話題女郎”未嘗不這是她的選擇，厭倦或者什么的。
PARIS同學設計的牛仔褲其實還不錯，發的唱片也比我想象中的要認真許多不僅僅只是在玩票。
我覺得其實她蠻聰明的，反正是不論怎樣都會受到矚目的一生，又何必壓抑真我滿足大眾的需要和幻想呢。
就像CRIBS的新專輯標題：“Men's Needs, Women's Needs, Whatever".
物質化為什么要看作是VAIN的代名詞？
總之，我喜歡，最好你也是。
抱歉還沒可以END這篇ENTRY，
我知道我SUPPOSE應該在看我早就應該START REVISING的CALCULUS。
但是我有點悶有點煩有點感觸，還有一點的自己無處安放。
也許是看了廣告狂人（Mad Man）看得有點小HIGH了吧。
一套講60年代美國廣告創意策劃人的美劇，第一季連載到第三集。
聽寫了一段對白，不要深究，我英文不好。
——She won't get married because she's never been in love.
I think I wrote that once to sell nylons.——For a lot of people,love isn't just a slogan.
——Oh, you mean love.
You mean the big lightening bolt to the heart
where you can't eat, and you can't work, and you just run off and get married and make babies.
The reason you haven't felt it is because it doesn't exist.
What you call love was invented by guys like me to sell nylons.——Is that right?
——I'm pretty sure about it.
You're born alone, and you die alone,
and this world just drops a bunch of rules on you to make you forget those facts,but I never forget.
I'm living like there's no tomorrow …because there isn't one.
Sad, ehh?
